Audacity

There’s something to be said about the audacity of some guys who are desperate to hook up. There’s something more to say about guys who try to hook up with a girl who’s taken. And then there’s something even more to say about guys who try to hook up with a girl whose boyfriend is right there, between you two.

Two weeks ago, I was waiting outside a restaurant in Chinatown with the Boy, who had invited me to have dinner with him and his mother. Out of nowhere, a drunken Frenchman dragging a suitcase behind him ambles up to us. Ignoring Boy, who was standing right between us, he looked straight at me and shot me a wide grin.

“It’s just this suitcase and me,” he declared, waving his free arm wildly. “Just me.”

The aroma of sour whiskey washed over me in waves, even from three feet away. “That’s… good,” I replied hesitantly.

He ducked his head to the side and, lifting his hand to his mouth, chuckled behind it. Then he spun around to face me again, pointing toward my chest.

“Would you like grab a drink with me?”

“Uhh, what?”

“Please, have a drink with me.”

I instinctively moved to hide behind the Boy. “Help me,” I muttered, burying my face behind his shoulder.

The Frenchman turned his gaze to Boy and gave him a friendly fist bump on the shoulder. “She’s so hot, she’s just… so hot.”

To my surprise, Boy grinned. “Oh yeah, she is,” he said, glancing over at me.

I shot him a glare.

Finally, Frenchman seemed to realize that Boy and I were together. He slapped his hand to his forehead, then started chuckling excitedly again.

“You know,” he said, huffing another puff of alcohol fumes in our direction, “This, this makes me so happy.” With the palm of his outstretched hand, he made a large circling motion around the two of us.

Boy looked back at me with his eyebrow raised. Is this dude for real? his expression read.

Frenchman made another circle around us then repeated himself. “This, you together, it is really great. It makes me so happy.”

“Alright, cool, thanks,” Boy said. He quickly ushered me into the restaurant and pulled us out of view of the doorway.

“What a crazy,” he laughed.

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